i hate jeans.

Guys, I really hate jeans. Like really, really hate them. And I’m going to reflect on that here. Because like, don’t hate, pontificate! But also I hate them. Additionally I will share some photos of me in jeans to display my ability to cavort comfortably with the enemy.

Let’s begin.

I hate jeans because they’re uncomfortable. THEY ARE SO UNCOMFORTABLE. I have never felt comfortable in jeans. I’ve tried every fit, brand, fabric, etc etc and I’ve never felt like my best self wearing jeans. There are some that fit great! And they look good in pics! And they feel OKAY but I wouldn’t say that I feel COMFORTABLE and like I can take over the world or anything.

They’re just jeans.

And that’s my second problem, they’re JUST jeans. I am so BORED by them. They’re classic and basic and predictable and I don’t want to be involved in any of that. That’s not me! I’m weird and wild and wacky. I am ABOVE jeans. I have ALLITERATION.

Jkjk I’m not ABOVE them. Like they’re fine. Rock jeans if you feel like your best self in them. I just don’t. I feel constricted and restricted. They hold me back. I can’t even kick my leg or do a cartwheel. It’s trash. And the trash is on fire.

I say this because I have ripped many pairs of jeans while kicking my leg or doing a cartwheel. This is the reality that I must deal with. Those were tight jeans, yes. So why don’t I wear loose jeans? Who wants to wear loose jeans?! Not me.

I do like a high waisted wide leg jean though. That’s kinda my thing now. Getting back into that style from middle school (1996-ish), when Limited Too had those wide leg jeans and they had like a blue thing in the back so you could tell they were from Limited Too. It was all about labels and being able to tell where something was from in 1996. I think I had one pair? Or I imagined that and I had no pairs. Limited Too was pretty much Chanel level in its unattainability for me so I didn’t actually have much from there.

I couldn’t find these Limited Too jeans on the internet to show an example and I am PISSED.

Also, I just really love leggings. I LOVE leggings.

I remember as a kid my mom wore leggings all the time and I was like “<eyeroll>NERD,” (sorry mom) but in college leggings came back in a BIG WAY and I was like wait a minute my mom was totally on to something. Leggings as pants were okay for some time there in the early 2000s and that was a best life situaish. Leggings as pants with Uggs or $5 black Old Navy flip flops – PERFECTION. I wish we could go back but alas we cannot.

So we soldier on.

I still love leggings but now with a dress or tunic-like top and combat boots. Honestly any casual outfit that would call for tights I wear leggings instead. My legs are warmer and they’re more comfortable than tights. I have a HUGE bin of tights that has not been used in over a year.

Again, the leggings allow me to kick my leg and do cartwheels WHILE WEARING A DRESS. They offer FULL COVERAGE while upside down! My 4 year old niece inspires me in a lot of ways but one of the MAIN ways is showing me that you can wear leggings or bike shorts under a dress and then literally take over the world.

YOU CAN DO ANYTHING.

Which is to say you don’t even NEED jeans. They’re useless to me at this point. If I wanna feel cute AND be an all terrain being I just wear my dress with leggings or bike shorts underneath. Boom. Ready to go.

When I was a little girl and I misbehaved, my mom would threaten me that my punishment would be that I would need to wear pants to school for a week. AN ENTIRE WEEK?! I would rather die so this threat made me behave. I assume I was probably pretty manipulative, or at least TRYING to be manipulative as a 6 year old, so really getting to the root of something I would hate and offering that as punishment was necessary.

Did this reinforce my already existing hatred of pants, or did it create it? I don’t know but either way I hate pants to this day and will avoid them at all costs.

After a year of COVID time only 3 pairs of jeans fit in my FILLED TO THE BRIM SO I HAVE TO YANK IT OPEN AND KICK IT CLOSED jeans drawer.

I have an entire huge drawer of jeans even though I hate them.

Shut up.

But now only 3% of them fit and I can’t decide if I should keep the ones that are too small in case I get a little smaller again from the singular act of moving around more in the outside world once that returns, or if I should throw them out. I just can’t decide.

I DO know that I DO NOT WANT TO BUY ANY MORE JEANS. BECAUSE I HATE THEM. I’m so frustrated by the fact that I don’t have many jeans that fit but also I don’t want any jeans so I’m kind of at a crossroads.

Hating jeans is specific to me, I’d like you to know. Like I don’t care if you wear jeans. Jeans are great for people who find them great! It’s okay! If I hated jeans on others I’d spend a large part of every day just hating and hating because so many people wear jeans. I would have an unsustainable amount of hate in my body and I would drop dead from the effort.

So you can have your jeans and I support you. BUT I DON’T WANT ANY.

self love soirée.

Hey hi just going to do a quick recap of the Self Love Soiree I attended on Saturday because self love is very important especially during these valentines times.

LIKE VERY IMPORTANT.

I’ve written about this before but I think Valentine’s Day is a great time to reflect on loving yourself. Wait have I written about this before? I know I’ve written about loving your friends on Valentine’s Day. Also important!

Either way, love yourself. Just do it. It feels great. It’s totally worth it. And in the world today there are actually a ton of opportunities for self love and self care and it’s now socially acceptable to take a break and take a breath and also to admire yourself so LET’S DO IT.

The night before the Self Love Soiree I returned to drinking after a dry January so it was VERY DIFFICULT to get going but I eventually got out of bed. After a cold brew and a green juice at The Cottage on Monticello I was happily on my way to Deep Space/The Hive for the Soiree.

Yes, I do go there every weekend I guess. My boyfriend referred to it as my “community center.” MAYBE IT IS. It’s great because I can walk there and there’s always fun stuff there! I don’t know how it could get any better. I’m not ashamed.

Unfortunately I was still very hungover so I didn’t get a lot of pics. But I’ll share with you what I did!

I was excited to get a pair of conversation heart earrings from Aly Cupcake/Aly’s Little Things. THEY ARE SO COOL. There’s nothing I love more than cute jewelry with bad words on it. That’s not a lie.

WTF.

She also had some really awesome pink/red/romantic looking earrings with Cupids and actual anatomical hearts on them that were SO COOL. Truthfully I really wanted these but technically I’m still in “No Shop Q1” so I’m not supposed to buy clothes or accessories.

I know I cheated with buying the convo heart earrings but they were like $10 so I think that’s a minimal shopping footprint.

Had to support a local business, you guys.

I really enjoyed checking out the display that find & revive set up. I realize I’m a broken record with this but the space looks so different at every event and I think that is so cool. I MEAN IT IS MY COMMUNITY CENTER, PEOPLE.

They had lots of reds and purples and animal print and it was all very romantic and lovely. Honestly I couldn’t even go near it because I would have been too tempted to buy.

I can’t wait until April 1.

This Saturday 2/13/21, find & revive will be back with a pop up at the Galentine’s event at Monroe’s in Hoboken so check THAT out. (I will)

Tainable, Kaze Jewels, and Dalia Handcrafts were also in attendance as vendors. I didn’t get to take the closest look at them on Saturday but I checked them out on Instagram and they all have great stuff so I hope to see them again when I can buy…EVERYTHING.

On my way out I got distracted by some books and I came across two advance copies of books I’ve been wanting to read! Like they’re released now but these copies were advance at one time and now very affordable because the person that had them originally was giving them away. Because books are expensive!

One of them is Detransition, Baby and it’s the next book for Roxanne Gay’s online book club The Audacious Book Club SO THIS WORKED OUT PERFECTLY. I can tell you more about the book club another time but it’s really incredibly great and you should also subscribe to her newsletter The Audacity BECAUSE WHY NOT.

I got the books from Xtina’s Variety and Vintage Shop and I’m going to be looking for more books there next time. BECAUSE BOOKS.

So that was the Self Love Soiree! I loved myself so much that I needed a nap after. A long one.

As far as my community center, there is a Galentine’s event there this weekend they’re hosting along with JC Women’s Collaborative that looks very fun so if you’re a gal and you have pals that are gals you should check it out.

jc women’s collaborative swap at xtina’s variety and vintage shop.

This past Saturday it was VERY COLD but it was also the day of the JC Women’s Collaborative swap at Xtina’s Variety and Vintage shop and I HAD TO GO.

I had never been to a clothing swap before and I’d honestly heard some scary stories. For some reason most of them involved “Brooklyn,” but it would be like “My friend took me to a swap in Brooklyn and it was a free for all!” Or, “I went to a swap in Brooklyn and everyone just GRABBED THINGS.”

To me it seemed like swaps were frightening because they included a competitive element and I wanted nothing to do with that. I’m not a competitive person and any kind of tense feelings really stress me out. I don’t want to FIGHT for things. It just seems like A LOT.

Anyway this swap WAS NOT LIKE THAT so don’t worry. It was great! It was very organized and didn’t feel like a race or a crazed collective grab for the best items or anything like that. It was all very civilized and fun.

Embarrassingly, I arrived 15 minutes early. I was ashamed. I didn’t intend to be that early and I felt like a nerd. Once again, I had walked way too fast and gotten very sweaty. One day I will learn my lesson but that day was not Saturday.

As I mentioned, IT WAS VERY COLD. LIKE VERY. Leading up to the swap Xtina had suggested that we wear layers, with a yoga pants/sports bra or tank layer at the bottom, so we could stay warm but also try on clothes over the bottom layer if we wanted. This was great advice because it worked out and I stayed warm.

COLD.

It’s very good to follow instructions, my friends.

Upon arrival we were given a wristband with a number on it and that indicated when it would be our turn to go upstairs to swap. (I was #2) (Be impressed.)

I’ve seen Deep Space Gallery and the store downstairs be set up a few different ways and it never stops impressing me with how versatile it is and the different ways they use the space. It’s just fun. There’s always something new to see.

While we waited for our turn to go upstairs to swap, DJs played music in the shop downstairs and we were invited to browse the shop and also the wares of some vendors that were in attendance – @cutpasteface, and @primcessart, and @talirose_art from @visioncoven

Again, there was so much stuff to look at. I really enjoy looking at stuff. A simple pleasure.

Soon enough it was time to go upstairs! The clothes were split up into racks by size, and there were tables organized by size for jeans and loungewear. Accessories were on a small table, and handbags were in a box.

We had 5 mins to choose 3 things and I suddenly got very excited so I didn’t take any pictures. I’m sorry, you’ll never know what the actual swap part actually looked like.

JK you can see some pics on Xtina’s Instagram, @xtina_moore. Calm down. Go look!

In the first round I got this BLUE TORY BURCH PURSE and I felt like I WON THE ENTIRE DAY. Like, this freakin freezing ass Saturday was MINE!

I MEAN LOOK AT IT!

After the first round we got back in line and went for the second round. This time we still had 5 mins but we could choose 5 items instead of 3. I was pumped because I got something in the second round that I had left behind in the first.

Despite not being a competitive person…I did feel like I was winning at this swap. I mean, NBD.

But I think everyone felt that way! It was a great and happy and positive experience. We all chatted in line and made new pals. We got excited when people picked one of the items we had dropped off. It was a nice feeling.

I came away from the swap with THE PURSE, a brand new with tags maxi dress from Anthropologie, a gold sequin top, a fun late 80s/early 90s looking cropped jacket with sparkly gold embroidery and velvet buttons, a basic black shift dress that is the SOFTEST jersey material, a tie-dyed Trader Joe’s T-shirt, and a couple more things. Those were my most favs.

I like the sequin/sparkly stuff best and there was actually a good amount of that there. I think because people only wear it for New Year’s Eve and then they’re done. But I like to wear sequins ALWAYS and you’re going to have to accept that THANKS.

So that was the swap! And they’re gonna have more! Follow JC Women’s Collaborative and Xtina on Instagram and they’ll keep you posted!

JC Women’s Collaborative also does in-person (socially distanced, when it’s nice) and Zoom meetups with guest speakers that are fun, informative, and thought-provoking. Their next Zoom meeting is on Feb 4 at 7pm and the topic is mental health, a v important topic! You can find more at @jcwomenscollaborative on Instagram.

And Xtina’s Variety and Vintage shop has a record sale event coming up this very weekend. On 1/30 1pm-5pm they’ll be selling records 4 for $1! I’m gonna go. If you like records maybe you should go too! I don’t know, I’m not your dad. They’re at 77 Cornelison Ave in Jersey City.

months and months of birchboxes pt. 2.

Once again I have collected months and months of unopened Birchboxes. And I’ve found myself with a BIRCHBOX BACKLOG.

WHAT AM I SAVING THEM FOR?!

I guess…this?

Let’s begin.

october 2020.

Okay honestly I don’t really know what month any of these are from but October was my best guess for this one, for whatever reason. I guess I could look it up but I don’t really feel like it.

I am very, VERY excited about the eyeshadow in this one because I need eyeshadow but I didn’t feel like buying it. I haven’t really used it for a while but want to put it back in the ‘ol routine, if I ever get to leave my house again.

This box also includes a product for “scalp detox.” Personally I am currently very into “scalp detox” because my poor scalp is really suffering. I never realized it could be a problem but it really kind of is. Hopefully this will help! Yay!

The makeup brush made me laugh because I collect makeup brushes like Birchboxes…I put them somewhere and never open them.

And that has to stop.

This month’s box design was really fun too, I love all these different ladies with their different lipsticks!

november 2020.

November is my BIRTHDAY MONTH so I know this one is from then because on the silly shipping label it said, “Happy Birthday Shannon Popov.”

Okay first of all, THIS BOX CONTAINS A JADE ROLLER. I have been wanting to try a jade roller forever but really didn’t feel like buying one. But here one is! In my hand! For me to try!

This box has an amika hair product in it, which is great, because amika makes the only styling products I’ve found that make my hair look how I want it to look. AND I NEED AS MUCH OF IT AS I CAN GET.

It also has a Rebecca Minkoff perfume sample, which got me thinking. For the last 3-ish years I have obsessively worn “Comptoir Sud Pacifique Vanille Abricot” (which I found via Birchbox) because it SMELLS LIKE DELICIOUS COOKIES but I’ve let that run out so I think it’s time to try some new stuff? Maybe for the next month or so I’ll try on all the perfume samples I’ve been hoarding. IT WILL BE FUN.

december 2020.

Is this from December? I think? The little card said something about the holidays?

The box is very understated but a peaceful blue. Peaceful is always good.

I’ve been trying to do a hair mask once or twice a week so I was VERY PLEASED to find a hair mask in here, as my hair mask supply is not infinite and needed to be replenished.

I really LOVE this red nail polish and I wish I opened this box before Xmas because I would have used the polish then. Whatever I’ll still use it now.

RED POLISH 4EVA.

Additionally this box has hand cream! Always need that. Every minute of every day. In every purse. Thx.

mystery month 1.

No idea what month this is from but I LOVE this flowery box! Wow! I wish I had something to do with the boxes besides throw them out…plz share ideas if you have any.

Biggest takeaway is that this box has a CANNABIS moisturizer and I’ve never tried that and I want to. I don’t think it’s going to MAKE MY FACE HIGH or anything but I’m interested to see what benefit it might add to a moisturizer…if anything.

I GUESS I’LL FIND OUT.

I love the hydrating collagen eye masks in this box, too. I’ve gotten them in a box two or three times before and I will always take them again because they’re great.

mystery month 2.

Another mystery. Who knows. I apologize for kind of half-assing this post but like…this was a lot of boxes, you guys. I will try to get back on track next month I swear.

Anyway, this box is like a little drawer and has a little pink tassel to pull it open. LOOK AT THE LITTLE PINK TASSEL IT IS EVERYTHING.

This box had a cute little bingo in it that you could fill out and post on social media and enter to win a prize. But I missed that because it was over at the end of September and I didn’t open the box until now. Maybe this was the August box? Either way, I’m sad about the bingo.

There is ANOTHER hair mask in this box and I’m just so glad that I’ve got more hair masks in my arsenal. My poor dry, frizzy hair needs to be masked as much as possible so it doesn’t fully snap off my head. It’s a tough life.

This box also has an Arrow lip product and I AM VERY INTO ARROW LIP PRODUCTS. I always enjoyed grabbing an Arrow lip balm in the Birchbox section of the Hollywood Walgreens. I MISS TRAVEL. SOB.

This appears to be a moisturizing oil and again I wish I opened this box sooner because my lips were REAL BAD around Xmas and I really needed some help and this would have…helped.

Next time.

That’s all the Birchboxes! Whew! Okay I have to take a nap now bye.

fun coats.

This is about fun coats, and fun coats only.

It’s fun coats Friday! We’ve had a long week and we deserve something fun.

So here are some fun coats.

I got super into fun coats in Fall 2019 when I had a Rent the Runway membership. THEY HAVE SO MANY FUN COATS.

But it doesn’t make sense to use Rent the Runway right now because I don’t want to be all dressed up with nowhere to go.

Although I OCCASIONALLY have somewhere to go, so I got some of my own fun coats to live at my home with me forever.

I got this one in Philadelphia when I took a trip there in the fall.

It’s from a store called The Raxx Vintage Emporium AND I LOVE IT. The coat AND the store.

This fun coat I got for Xmas from my boyfriend!

It’s from Mint Market in Jersey City. Actually maybe he got it at the Hoboken one. The world will never know.

I’ve always wanted a black and white fur/faux fur and here it is all my dreams came true.

Last we have this blue leopard fun coat my mom and dad got me for Xmas!

This fun coat is from ban.do.

I used to have an intense love affair with ban.do but it came out over the summer that their co-founder/CCO had acted like a racist jerk so I broke up with them for a while.

The co-founder/CCO left and I kept an eye to make sure they were working on themselves and I feel good about the learning they’ve done so I’m back for more ban.do.

We can all always learn more though, of course.

Those are the fun coats. Happy Friday.

what to wear during your holiday break vol. 2.

One of my favorite posts to put together last year was “what to wear during your holiday break” and now I’m back for more.

As you may know this year was a completely different year from last year and we all spent a ton of time sitting around our houses on our asses. We’ve been wearing lazy clothes while hiding in our houses this entire year and we’re not going to stop anytime soon.

Overall I’m not really a proponent of lazy clothes. I like to “look cute” and “get dressed up.” I really, REALLY miss wearing black tights and dresses and makeup and real shoes. This is really, really hard for me.

But I thought it would still be fun to celebrate some lazy clothes because I got quite a few new lazy clothes this year and they’re kinda fun!

So here we go.

what to wear during your holiday break while you’re reading a book.

Yes I’m reading Home Body. Every single one of a certain kind of gal is currently reading it as we speak. I guess I’m just that kind of gal.

The kind of gal that likes amazing poetry without really knowing that much about poetry. But it’s amazing.

My outfit is from ACTA and it’s my favorite new lazy outfit. It’s really soft but not TOO soft. I love the material. I have a code for ACTA if you have any interest. Click here to go to their site and use code SHANIMAL15 for 15% off.

If not, move along.

what to wear during your holiday break when you want to fret over the impeding apocalypse but in a onesie.

This is a leopard onesie.

I guess it’s kind of intense and I think it’s a size too small because it’s not as comfy as I hoped.

It’s from Old Navy. The small size isn’t their fault, it’s just my assumption that I can still wear the same size I could wear back in March.

Which is an untrue assumption.

what to wear during your holiday break while protecting your bird from certain death.

Here’s a sports bra option for when you have to turn up the heat all the way for your bird and it’s too hot to live with a shirt on.

My tropical budgie pal Elvis needs to be protected from a draft at all costs. If he feels the slightest chill you can see in his face that he is terrified of his swift imminent death.

He needs to stay warm so we keep him warm. That’s what we do in this family. Even if human family members have to take our shirts off in the middle of winter. Bra top is from Free People.

what to wear during your holiday break to look out the window and feel sad because you miss your friends and family.

When it’s cold and I don’t want to deal with being outside but it’s still sunny and I need sunlight, I love to sit by the window.

I love to sit by the window and stare at the street and think about all the fun I’ve missed, Santa baby.

This year has been shitty. We all know it. A lot of us won’t see our families. I’ve been quarantining to see my parents and sister for Xmas but I won’t be able to see my brother and his family. It’s a tough pill to swallow. I’m choking on it. So is my mom.

So I’ll just sulk here by the window in my cropped “Jersey City” sweatshirt from JaneDO and tie dyed pants from Old Navy because like what else to I have to do?

what to wear during your holiday break while you adult color and/or reenact a preschool school photo.

I need to get back into adult coloring. It is fun, soothing, passes the time…all good things.

Adult coloring really relaxes the mind. For a long time I thought it was a hoax and a trap but my sister got me this adult coloring book a couple of years ago and it just feels good to do.

This also looks like a photo of me that I have from preschool that I’m going to try to find when I go home this week. STAY TUNED.

Oh PS the whole outfit is from Old Navy. I love the thermal top because it has moons and stars on it. A VIBE.

what to wear during your holiday break while wrapping presents but only a couple at a time because it really hurts your back.

I got this sweatsuit in the fall and I do love that it’s a like a MATCHING SUIT.

It’s also nice that it’s red so it’s festive and if I put on a green headband it’s red AND green and THAT is a beautiful thing.

Sweatsuit is Old Navy again. 85% of this stuff is Old Navy. As I said, I’m not usually a fan of lazy clothes but now that I pretty much wear them every day I like to have a lot of options and Old Navy has cheap but quality options. It may be cheap but it’s also soft and comfortable and I AM INSIDE OF MY HOUSE.

Also, wrapping presents really, REALLY makes my back hurt and I’m not sure why but if you have any tips plz share.

what to wear during your holiday break while you get in bed and wait for santa.

Oh shit did that sound sexual? It’s not, I just meant wait until it’s time to open your presents.

The time goes slow when you’re stuck inside, so it’s nice to be comfortable while you wait.

This is another full matching sweatsuit but it’s not very flattering so I’ll just reveal the top half. Some things remain sacred.

Best wishes for cozy holiday outfits for every single one of you, my friends.

jc women’s collaborative holiday bazaar at the hive goods.

I’m now in the midst of a personal two week quarantine but the last fun social thing I did out in the public was check out the JC Women’s Collaborative Holiday Bazaar at The Hive Goods.

The Hive Goods is the downstairs shop at one of my favorite local galleries, Deep Space. This was the first time I was there specifically for shopping and not only for art-gawking. And I was ready to shop my face off.

Like many women (I hope I’m not the only one?) I have an issue when it’s gift buying time in which I buy gifts for myself instead of for others. OR gifts for myself in addtion to the gifts I’m getting for others. It’s just the way it goes. I love stuff just as much as the next real work-from-home housewife of New Jersey. It’s just the way it is. And I’m not sorry.

So there was a TON of stuff there that I would have LOVED to buy for myself, or even the majority of my female relatives. But the problem was, I already got the gifts for the other gals so I was mostly looking for something for my dad and brother who are both THE HARDEST TO SHOP FOR.

(I hope) they read this, so I won’t reveal what exactly I got for them but I did find a small thing or two for each of them!

But mostly I got things for myself.

I tried.

Here’s a bit about some of the vendors!:

the hive goods.

As I said I’ve never gone over to 77 Corneilson just for shopping so I was very excited. Because shopping!

The most exciting thing to be done was go up to the roof and socially distance myself and fill up a bag with stuff in the bins up there for TEN DOLLARS.

Xtina, matriarch of The Hive Goods, sources and sells vintage and consignment items, and also hosts clothing swaps in the shop. So there were BINS ON BINS.

There was so much stuff! I got two little clutch purses in wild colors BECAUSE WHY NOT.

I got a skirt.

A picture frame that I put this year’s Xmas card in!

Also a print of a peacock because I need to surround myself with feathered friends THANKS.

I got even MORE stuff but I can’t tell because that stuff was gifts.

I DID get some gifts. OKAY?!

a petal to peddle.

These wreaths were BEAUTIFUL and the first kiosk you saw when you approached the building.

I follow A Petal to Peddle on Instagram but for whatever reason I’ve never seen their stuff in real life and it was SO PRETTY.

And smelled so nice. LIKE PINE.

Because WREATHS.

These items were all wanted by me and me alone so I couldn’t get any because I was supposed to be getting GIFTS. But next time it’s game on.

tia planta.

Tia Planta is the plant aunt you’ve always wanted and it clearly says it in her name and therefore cannot be denied.

Even though plants meet certain death as my wards, I LOVE PLANTS AND TO BE AMONG THEM.

The Hive Goods was completely transformed for this bazaar and I love to see the different ways a space can be used. It gets me pumped up. Who knows why. But I think the best new and innovative use of a space I already know and love was putting a forest of plants on top of the pool table.

It just looked totally awesome.

I didn’t get any plants because I wasn’t in a position to carry them around on my Saturday activities but that didn’t mean I didn’t WANT to.

Tia Planta also currently has a pop up kiosk in McGinley Sq and after I’m done with my self quar for Xmas I plan to head over.

artesana pottery.

It’s no secret that I love some pottery. Or maybe I’ve never talked about it. I don’t remember.

Artesana Pottery was SUPER cool and unique and each piece is the literal definition of one of a kind. I know that because the gal in charge of the pottery told me it was so.

This great gal ALSO gave us some coquito and it was INCREDIBLE. Super into coquito these days and 10/10 would Artesana Coquito(TM) again.

I did end up getting something for myself here and it was this hand dish with SPIDERS on it to save for Halloween decor next year.

She also had a number of pieces with generic birds and also OWLS and I was VERY TEMPTED.

I do follow her on Instagram so I can always order there. When it’s socially appropriate to buy things for myself again.

slow burn alters.

Slow Burn Alters was recently created by a gal of all trades, master of most of them, who also does some art, beautiful (and heartbreaking in a good way) poetry I’ve come across on the internets, and community reach out via a group called Locality Giveback.

Whew!

As for the alters, they were nicely put together and packaged – a perfect gift for a pal or fam member who is in touch with the spiritual side of themselves.

My pal got one and we opened it up back at her house and it had a tiny little baby candle with a holder and a crystal and a sage thingy and it was so mini and compact and also perfectly suited for its purpose and was therefore swoon-worthy. Even though I personally am not spiritual at all and unsure of its purpose…I still felt like it HAD to have checked all the boxes for a rad spiritual moment at home or on the go.

jc women’s collaborative.

JC Women’s Collaborative is a group I’ve been seeing around the town and they seemed fun and not mean and I’ve been meaning to go to one of their events! One time they had one in Lincoln Park in the fall and I couldn’t find them and I gave up and just laid on a blanket and watched their Instagram stories. As we existed in parallel universes in the same park…

So I was glad I found my way to this event! They ran the show and were super welcoming. They gave out fun Jersey City masks (“fun” because anything with “Jersey City” written on it is VERY FUN to me), hand sanitizer, coffee, and overall “vibes.”

They even gave me some cups for our coquito when I know I was being very annoying asking for them. TRUE HEROES!

In addition to hosting this bazaar, they also hosted a super fun and festive Zoom holiday party on Thursday and it was worth the hangover I had after 2 glasses of wine and one beer.

I GOT 8/10 ON THE TRIVIA.

Just had to tell someone.

flow initiative.

Not a vendor, but The Flow Initiative was at the event collecting period products. I’ve had a long saga with these period products. I got an IUD a few years ago and didn’t know I wouldn’t get a period anymore but I don’t AND I LOVE IT. But, I had all these tampons. Like three boxes. Just collecting dust.

I have been meaning to bring them to JaneDO, and to the last show at Deep Space to pass off to Xtina.

They were in a bag by my door. I forgot them like 5 times in a month-long period. I think eventually they got thrown away.

I had to go buy more before the event.

BUT I GOT THEM SOME TAMPONS TO CONTINUE CHANGING THE WORLD BY GETTING PERIOD PRODUCTS FOR THOSE THAT NEED THEM.

And I’m glad.

The JC Women’s Collaborative Holiday Bazaar at The Hive Goods was obviously badass. There were additional vendors but I didn’t even really get to spend time with them all. I hope they do it again just because and I can buy stuff for ME. maybe in the spring?

Well, The Hive Goods is also doing it again! It’s tomorrow (12/20) so I can’t go since I have to quar, but YOU should go. It’s 1-6pm at 77 Corneilson Ave in Jersey City.

Go on, git.

chicken spaghetti outfit.

I haven’t done a post of an outfit for a long time because I never get good feedback on posts of outfits. It’s always, “No one cares about you in outfits.”

But you know what? I care about me in outfits. And it’s fun. And I have nothing to really live for right now. So here’s a post about an outfit.

I tried to take some pictures with my mom’s chickens because I love them and they are my friends. At least I thought they were my friends until I tried to get them to participate in these photos.

And they didn’t.

They really enjoy spaghetti! Usually…

The chickens didn’t show much interest in spaghetti during the time I was taking the photos. Once I stopped taking the photos they were once again interested.

Let’s just say the chickens were being straight up bitches.

Beyond the lack of cooperation from my fellow models, I enjoy this outfit and it was fun to put together.

I love these boots because they’re very high and make it a little “fancy” but they’re super chunky and therefore comfortable. They’re from H&M.

20% off everything — no code needed! We’re kicking off Black Friday today! Shop safe, shop smart, shop early.

This leopard blazer sweater from JCrew is probably my favorite addition to my closet this fall. I rented one similar to it from Rent the Runway last year and I’m glad to own one now.

I dislike wearing my hair up but a woman waiting in line for the bathroom with me last night told me I “look like Lady Gaga” so that was a nice perk and I’ll take it. If I DO wear it up I think a headband def helps. This is also from JCrew.

Of course it’s only appropriate to wear Jersey City shirts while away from Jersey City, and this is one of my old favorites from Kanibal.

The pants are linen pants and they’re pretty loose. I’ve gained a lot of weight in the past 6 months so loose is the way to go when it comes to pants, thanks.

Glad to be back talking about my outfits think I’ll do it some more soon you’re welcome.

peacock costume.

In my mind nothing can really top last year’s Ms. Frizzle costume. But this year I had some fun making a peacock costume.

Halloween is different this year! Everything is different this year! We have to do the best we can! Overall, Halloween was a welcome distraction from all of the lame crap going on: COVID, the election, the end of the world as we know it.

I decided on a peacock costume for three reasons:

  1. I’m obsessed with birds.
  2. I’ve been really into a blue and green color palette lately.
  3. I thought it would be relatively easy to create a peacock costume on my own. “Easy” as in high reward with not much effort.

the materials.

My interpretation of a peacock required the following materials:

Blue Bodysuit – I selected a bodysuit with long legs and sleeves because it’s going to be incredibly freezing today.

Blue Wig – Wigs are really fun to wear and I wanted an excuse to wear one, even though peacocks don’t technically wear blue wigs or really have any blue features on their heads at all.

Blue Ribbon – I was afraid I didn’t get enough and in the end I actually really didn’t get enough and would get way more if I ever do this or something like this again.

Not enough.

Peacock Feathers – Duh.

Duh.

Peacock Fan – I thought this would be a fun way to mimic the “tail” and also give me the opportunity to carry around and use a prop. I LOVE A PROP. This fan can also be used for other future fun fancy events! If it doesn’t get lost in the graveyard tonight. TBD.

Face Rhinestones – I have never used these before so we’ll see what happens.

Blue/Green Glitter – It has been a year since I got this glitter on sale at Target and it has been floating around in my Caboodle and getting in my way this whole time. Very excited to finally use it. And yes that link is to the pink/purple version. They’re out of blue I guess. Not my problem.

Feathery False Eyelashes – No idea how these are going to work. I may not even be able to figure it out. We’ll see.

construction.

I constructed the costume last night and as I predicted it required minimal effort. There was only one part of it that required construction, the feathery part.

I just cut the ribbon to make a “belt” and then cut more pieces of ribbon to tie peacock feathers onto the “belt.”

Essentially making a peacock “tail.”

Keep in mind this is technically the “tail” of a male peacock so in a way this is peacock drag. Dude birds are just prettier and therefore better to model costumes after. It’s not my fault.

Perhaps a hot glue gun would have been more effective but I got the wrong size glues for mine last year and then never got the right size glues. I’m no craft master and never claimed to be one, you guys.

That’s it! Not going to post the finished product until later. So get excited. Or something.

put your puritanism back in your pants.

After I wrote this I did a fact check to make sure puritanical behavior was actually the Puritan’s fault and some sources disagreed. I still don’t like their overall vision and will leave them as my scapegoat for this.

I’m going to have to respectfully request that you take your puritanism and you put it back in your pants.

If that doesn’t work I will full-on disrespectfully demand that you shove it up your own ass.

Are you listening? Cool.

It’s likely you’re aware that my favorite way to dress is almost naked. It’s been that way since birth. I’ve always loved a revealing outfit. I’m not ever going to stop loving revealing outfits. They’re a part of me. The very fabric of my being is woven with threads of cleavage and short skirts and bathing suits while not at the beach. This is nothing new. But for some reason sometimes folks still have something to say. And I blame the Puritans.

By Puritans I mean the people that started some shit in this county. By “some shit” I mean they were one of the groups on the front lines of stealing the land of Native Americans and justifying their behavior by saying it was “god’s” idea. Also burning women alive if they didn’t like their overall vibe. You know, those Puritans. Bunch of jerks.

Unforch their beliefs and behaviors about sexuality and people’s bodies and the ways people are allowed to dress their bodies hang over us like an ominous cloud. Like why is this cloud still here? Their buildings have survived so I guess maybe that’s why the cloud of nonsensical judgement has. I don’t really know. It’s stubborn as hell. It’s giving me a headache. I really can’t stand it.

During my fact check I found that their ideas lasted so long and permeated our whole society because they valued intelligence and had a high level of literacy and that is…terrifying. They used their nerd powers for bad! Ugh! The worst!

Simply existing as a woman in the world is hard enough. You can be physically over-powered at any time. There’s a need to be “careful” and to have an “awareness.” It’s exhausting. Part of your “awareness” has to do with the way you dress and the “kind of signals you’re sending out with your wardrobe choices.” Ugh. Shut up.

My biggest problem being, if you care about how you look and like how you look and take pride in it and really want to go all out that suddenly becomes some kind of “problem” because you’re being “slutty” or “thirsty” and according to the ominous cloud of sexist bullshit that hangs over all of us you’re not allowed to “do that” because it’s “wrong.”

This gets me so incredibly angry.

And it’s not just men. Women do this to each other and reinforce the whole ridiculous thing day in and day out. It’s like, “Oh that woman over there? She’s a thirsty slut, bye.” A

re they jealous because they can’t find the strength to go all out? Probably. But more likely they’re just brainwashed and we have to help them see the light, too. WE HAVE TO HELP EACH OTHER. (And if they don’t like wearing revealing clothes on their own bodies I’m not saying they have to. They choose their choice. Just so that’s clear.)

I’ve cared about how I look, liked how I look, took pride in how I look, and have “really wanted to go all out” since day one. I felt like this as a child, as a preteen, as a teenager, as an adult. I’ve felt like this at every size I’ve ever been, with every haircut. Sometimes I look back and I’m like “meh, don’t love this style now.” But never once have I said, “I regret going all out on that,” as far as the level of how revealing it was.

Because I don’t. And I shouldn’t be made to regret it. And I’m really going to start kicking people again if that’s what it’s going to have to come down to.

My parents never told me what to wear. And before you’re like, “Did they just let you run around with no shoes on and bite people like a feral child of the forest?!” please pause and realize that they were very disciplined about many other things. We weren’t allowed to play with toy guns. We weren’t allowed to eat candy cigarettes because they encouraged actual cigarette behavior. Stuff like that. THE IMPORTANT LIFE THREATENING ISSUES WERE EXPRESSED TO US AND WE WERE TAUGHT TO BE WARY OF THEM.

THE CLOTHES YOU WEAR ARE NOT A LIFE THREATENING ISSUE.

Tight dress in 8th grade = TOTALLY FINE LEAVE ME ALONE THX.

And if you wanna be like, “If you dress in a revealing way you’re making yourself a target for assault”…then you’re barking up the wrong tree. YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM. MAYBE WE SHOULD WORRY ABOUT STOPPING THE ASSAULT INSTEAD OF POLICING PEOPLE’S CLOTHING I DON’T KNOW JUST AN IDEA.

Perhaps we should teach people from a very young age that the amount of clothing someone is wearing doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t mean they want to have sex with you. It doesn’t mean they want your validation or attention. It doesn’t mean that they’re somehow weaker and could potentially be a victim. It’s not a thing. It’s clothing. It’s on them. Move along. Also you’re 4 years old. Calm down.

I realize that it’s part of BIOLOGY for people pay attention to secondary sex characteristics and that’s why when people see “boobs” they immediately think “sex.” But I’m talking about SOCIETY and I think by now after thousands of years around here we should be able to integrate our societal intelligence with our biological intelligence and like DO BETTER.

It’s called evolution EVER HEARD OF IT.

Also what’s that thing that moms are always talking about that it’s okay to breastfeed in public? Like, boobs have OTHER PURPOSES. THEY FEED BABIES. SO BOOBS CAN ALSO JUST SIT THERE AND BE A PART OF SOMEONE’S BODY AND NOT CAUSE YOU TO AUTOMATICALLY RELATE THEM TO SEX, YA SICKO.

I’m just annoyed. I know this isn’t anything that hasn’t been said before. But this is where I stand. And I will continue to stand here, scantily clad. And I won’t feel bad about it. So go find someone else to bother if you want to make someone feel bad. BECAUSE I DON’T, SO SHUT UP ALREADY.