what to wear during your holiday break vol. 2.

One of my favorite posts to put together last year was “what to wear during your holiday break” and now I’m back for more.

As you may know this year was a completely different year from last year and we all spent a ton of time sitting around our houses on our asses. We’ve been wearing lazy clothes while hiding in our houses this entire year and we’re not going to stop anytime soon.

Overall I’m not really a proponent of lazy clothes. I like to “look cute” and “get dressed up.” I really, REALLY miss wearing black tights and dresses and makeup and real shoes. This is really, really hard for me.

But I thought it would still be fun to celebrate some lazy clothes because I got quite a few new lazy clothes this year and they’re kinda fun!

So here we go.

what to wear during your holiday break while you’re reading a book.

Yes I’m reading Home Body. Every single one of a certain kind of gal is currently reading it as we speak. I guess I’m just that kind of gal.

The kind of gal that likes amazing poetry without really knowing that much about poetry. But it’s amazing.

My outfit is from ACTA and it’s my favorite new lazy outfit. It’s really soft but not TOO soft. I love the material. I have a code for ACTA if you have any interest. Click here to go to their site and use code SHANIMAL15 for 15% off.

If not, move along.

what to wear during your holiday break when you want to fret over the impeding apocalypse but in a onesie.

This is a leopard onesie.

I guess it’s kind of intense and I think it’s a size too small because it’s not as comfy as I hoped.

It’s from Old Navy. The small size isn’t their fault, it’s just my assumption that I can still wear the same size I could wear back in March.

Which is an untrue assumption.

what to wear during your holiday break while protecting your bird from certain death.

Here’s a sports bra option for when you have to turn up the heat all the way for your bird and it’s too hot to live with a shirt on.

My tropical budgie pal Elvis needs to be protected from a draft at all costs. If he feels the slightest chill you can see in his face that he is terrified of his swift imminent death.

He needs to stay warm so we keep him warm. That’s what we do in this family. Even if human family members have to take our shirts off in the middle of winter. Bra top is from Free People.

what to wear during your holiday break to look out the window and feel sad because you miss your friends and family.

When it’s cold and I don’t want to deal with being outside but it’s still sunny and I need sunlight, I love to sit by the window.

I love to sit by the window and stare at the street and think about all the fun I’ve missed, Santa baby.

This year has been shitty. We all know it. A lot of us won’t see our families. I’ve been quarantining to see my parents and sister for Xmas but I won’t be able to see my brother and his family. It’s a tough pill to swallow. I’m choking on it. So is my mom.

So I’ll just sulk here by the window in my cropped “Jersey City” sweatshirt from JaneDO and tie dyed pants from Old Navy because like what else to I have to do?

what to wear during your holiday break while you adult color and/or reenact a preschool school photo.

I need to get back into adult coloring. It is fun, soothing, passes the time…all good things.

Adult coloring really relaxes the mind. For a long time I thought it was a hoax and a trap but my sister got me this adult coloring book a couple of years ago and it just feels good to do.

This also looks like a photo of me that I have from preschool that I’m going to try to find when I go home this week. STAY TUNED.

Oh PS the whole outfit is from Old Navy. I love the thermal top because it has moons and stars on it. A VIBE.

what to wear during your holiday break while wrapping presents but only a couple at a time because it really hurts your back.

I got this sweatsuit in the fall and I do love that it’s a like a MATCHING SUIT.

It’s also nice that it’s red so it’s festive and if I put on a green headband it’s red AND green and THAT is a beautiful thing.

Sweatsuit is Old Navy again. 85% of this stuff is Old Navy. As I said, I’m not usually a fan of lazy clothes but now that I pretty much wear them every day I like to have a lot of options and Old Navy has cheap but quality options. It may be cheap but it’s also soft and comfortable and I AM INSIDE OF MY HOUSE.

Also, wrapping presents really, REALLY makes my back hurt and I’m not sure why but if you have any tips plz share.

what to wear during your holiday break while you get in bed and wait for santa.

Oh shit did that sound sexual? It’s not, I just meant wait until it’s time to open your presents.

The time goes slow when you’re stuck inside, so it’s nice to be comfortable while you wait.

This is another full matching sweatsuit but it’s not very flattering so I’ll just reveal the top half. Some things remain sacred.

Best wishes for cozy holiday outfits for every single one of you, my friends.

chicken spaghetti outfit.

I haven’t done a post of an outfit for a long time because I never get good feedback on posts of outfits. It’s always, “No one cares about you in outfits.”

But you know what? I care about me in outfits. And it’s fun. And I have nothing to really live for right now. So here’s a post about an outfit.

I tried to take some pictures with my mom’s chickens because I love them and they are my friends. At least I thought they were my friends until I tried to get them to participate in these photos.

And they didn’t.

They really enjoy spaghetti! Usually…

The chickens didn’t show much interest in spaghetti during the time I was taking the photos. Once I stopped taking the photos they were once again interested.

Let’s just say the chickens were being straight up bitches.

Beyond the lack of cooperation from my fellow models, I enjoy this outfit and it was fun to put together.

I love these boots because they’re very high and make it a little “fancy” but they’re super chunky and therefore comfortable. They’re from H&M.

20% off everything — no code needed! We’re kicking off Black Friday today! Shop safe, shop smart, shop early.

This leopard blazer sweater from JCrew is probably my favorite addition to my closet this fall. I rented one similar to it from Rent the Runway last year and I’m glad to own one now.

I dislike wearing my hair up but a woman waiting in line for the bathroom with me last night told me I “look like Lady Gaga” so that was a nice perk and I’ll take it. If I DO wear it up I think a headband def helps. This is also from JCrew.

Of course it’s only appropriate to wear Jersey City shirts while away from Jersey City, and this is one of my old favorites from Kanibal.

The pants are linen pants and they’re pretty loose. I’ve gained a lot of weight in the past 6 months so loose is the way to go when it comes to pants, thanks.

Glad to be back talking about my outfits think I’ll do it some more soon you’re welcome.

i got this acupuncture thing.

In the spirit of ordering any and all of the random shit on the internet, I got this acupuncture thing.

It’s possible that you know that I struggle with terrible lower back pain, just like <some really large number>% of adults over 20 years old. Back pain is just a thing we all battle and I guess I have to accept it. But I’m constantly searching for something to help it suck less, so I got this acupuncture thing.

One time during Real Life, I went and got real acupuncture. My insurance covered it and I felt rich with privilege and resources so I made an appointment. The man performing it, the wielder of the needles, was very kind and patient. The treatment itself was terrifying and I audibly screamed and probably freaked him out. I never went back.

Close up of the needles on the acupuncture thing, not scary!

The needle somehow hit one of my nerves in my back and sent a zap all the way down to a needle that was in my calf. It was one of the weirdest physical things I have ever felt. I was not okay. “Zap” isn’t a scientific word and yes this isn’t scientifically proven but I was still scared by it. Scientifically scared by it. IT TRIGGERED A FIGHT OR FLIGHT RESPONSE. So I got this acupuncture thing.

I guess maybe I like the pillow thing best.

The acupuncture thing is pink and I can lay on it 10-15 minutes per day. I’ve started laying on it and trolling Instagram between my 2 workouts in the morning. I can also put my head on the little pillow part and it’s supposed to help with headaches. This is helpful because I have an almost constant pounding headache.

Everything is fine.

I kind of almost don’t have a headache here.

They (the acupuncture thing overlords) recommend putting the little pillow part under your bare feet while seated, “a great way to start the day!” Okay.

You can put the full pad on your chair to target your butt and legs. There’s really nothing you can’t do!

So far I don’t feel like it’s doing much but I think it may have to be part of a bigger stretching and relaxation routine. And once that stuff is in place the acupuncture thing will complement the rest. I do notice a difference in my headaches while I’m resting my head on the little pillow…they go away! But that is only for 10-15 minutes a day and then the squeezing, pounding daily routine returns. I’d really like that number to go up.

Another time I kind of almost didn’t have a headache.

Thx.

no shop Q1.

Today I’m here to tell you about No Shop Q1 and how I failed at No Shop Q1.

This year, 2020, the year of our discontent, I failed at no shop Q1. Last year, 2019, I was able to do it successfully. Oh and the year before! Jeez, I was killin it.

But this year I failed.

“No Shop Q1” is something I invented for myself as like a resolution/challenge/personal growth thingy. I have a hard time NOT shopping. In fact, I sometimes shop every day, even if it’s just a small thing, like a scrunchie. That still counts as shopping. But OMG isn’t it so exciting that scrunchies are BACK?!

New scrunchies!

I didn’t know what the quarters of a financial year were until a couple of years ago when I started doing invoice stuff at work. This was idiotic on my part because the quarters of a financial year are the same as a regular year, which has twelve months and four quarters with three months each quarter. Okay that’s enough math for now. But when I learned what the quarters were and how people referred to them in “business,” it made me laugh to use them describe stuff that happened in my personal life.

I laugh a lot.

So No Shop Q1 was born. The rules of No Shop Q1 in 2018 began as: No shopping for clothes, shoes, jewelry, or accessories. The rules casually extended to No buying shit for your house, aka towels, placemats, vases, rugs, assorted “knick-knacks,” etc, etc. In 2018 I was able to stick with this. I really didn’t shop at all! At the end of No Shop Q1 in 2018, April 1, I awarded myself with a Rent the Runway Unlimited subscription and I was like, “OMG I’ll never have to shop again!”

Plot twist: I DID shop again, despite the Rent the Runwaty Unlimited membership. Can’t stop won’t stop.

Last year I stuck to the first rule successfully, but brazenly punched the second rule in the face. I bought so so much shit for my house because I was moving on April 15 and I LOVE THAT HOUSE SHIT. IT GOT OUT OF HAND. But at least I stuck to not buying clothes.

This year, 2020, I was already ready to give up on the whole thing by March 1. Even BEFORE that, in February, Rent the Runway sent me an email like, “We miss you! Come back for 50% off the month!” And I was like OMG obviously I HAVE to do that and renting ISN’T BUYING, RIGHT? You’re still spending money on clothes, dumbass.

Of course I took the offer!

By the time we were locked inside on March 15 or so, I was hardcore back to shopping. I got a ton of bracelets, and accidentally shipped them to my office. So they’re there, waiting for me. I’ve been aspiring toward a badass stack of bracelets and I can’t wait to debut it when I have more of an audience than my computer screen.

A stack from the past that I was proud of.

Headbands also really caught my eye and I got one in every color.

Love the colors 😍🤤

Along with necklaces.

And fun earrings.

Last, I got some skirts to wear with t-shirts because that just felt right. I thought I didn’t have that many skirts and then I cleaned my closet and realized I do. But didn’t have any that are like the new ones I got yet so I consider that a win.

JK I lied I did already have a denim skirt similar to this new one 😬

After a week or so of online shopping sprees, I got sad that I wouldn’t be able to wear this stuff for a while. Like I actually DO NOT EVEN KNOW when I’ll be able to wear this stuff outside. And I decided that getting MORE stuff may make me MORE depressed…which would be unprecedented. But I gave it up for now, just in case.

Even though I’ve stopped for now, I still failed at No Shop Q1. I also already failed at a potential No Shop Quarantine. I guess I could do No Shop <any other of the Qs> or No Shop Summer? Wait there is no WAY I can do No Shop Summer. I need at least 4 more bathing suits.

Life is hard.

shirts that are bras.

Soon it’s going to be warm outside, and like it or not we will be able to go outside and dress naked. There’s nothing I love more than dressing naked. I can’t wait to wear shirts that are bras.

I have a ton of shirts that are actually bras. To the naked eye, yes they are bras. But all of them were sold in the “shirts” section and I have worn them as shirts more than once.

It’s all about perception. And perception is reality.

Are these shirts or bras? You decide.

Actually, I decide. I’ve already decided. They’re shirts. Thx.

shirt that’s a bra with a kimono.

New favorite outfit. Never put this together before today and pretty pumped about it.

shirt that’s a bra that’s def a bra.

shirt that’s a bra with buttons.

Snake necklace from Kanibal & Co, my boyfriend got it for me 🙂

shirt that’s a bra with shorts that match it.

If you think it looks like pajamas you thought WRONG.

shirt that’s a bra and also denim.

This shirt is also wrinkled because my steamer is broken.

shirt that’s a bra and i like the back.

I took these pics in my closet that I’ve recently cleaned! It’s the size of a small room so I can now use it as a room to take photos in. Very exciting stuff.

Most of these tops are from Free People. They specialize in shirts that are actually bras. The skirt in the last section is from Express and I’ve had it since my freshman year of high school…WHICH WAS 1999.

i applied to #SephoraSquad.

I applied to #SephoraSquad because it sounds fun as hell and also because there isn’t anything fun to do these days besides fill out forms on the internet.

If you want, and also like to fill out forms on the internet, you can give them a little testimonial about me and why you enjoy and are entertained by the shanimal of it all. To help me get on the squad! You guys! And you can submit that testimonial here.

If not, please enjoy this image they generated for me to share with you. I believe it just shows my Instagram profile pic and my two most liked recent posts. One of my most liked recent posts, and I think my most liked post OF ALL TIME, is a pic from Getty images in 2002 of a pangolin. I have no idea why this post was my most liked post of all time. But pangolins are pretty darn cute.

the rent the runway flagship store is bananas.

You guys, I’d like you to know that I’ve been renting the runway since the beginning (2009, srsly). Like since the very moment the runway was rolled out, I’ve been renting that bitch. We’ve come a long way together and now they have a whole entire store in Flatiron right by my work. The Rent the Runway flagship store is bananas.

Part of renting the runway is returning the runway so you can get more runway for your runway. In my professional and well researched opinion, the Rent the Runway flagship store is bananas mostly because of these returns.

People who work in Manhattan rush into the store in the morning before work to return things so they can then order another thing and hopefully get it by the end of the day. Thus fully maximizing their 4 items at a time subscription. I mean at least this is what I do. I’m sure everyone else is aiming to do this as well, I can see it in their eyes.

Rent the Runway uses a very specific kind of garment bag to deliver their wares and you can recognize these garment bags around the city. Well, around the CITIES, I see women carrying them all over in JC and NYC. Also in Hoboken but forget about Hoboken it’s irrelevant.

I think I should hang my jeans up like this and maybe I’d like them better.

Around 8:30 in the morning there is a SWARM of 20 and 30 something women carrying in these bags, marching down W 15th street in their booties and jeans with their hair that is all the same color. Seriously how is everyone’s hair the same ombré color? It’s like one ombré creator invented ombré and there is only one option for ombré and it all looks the same like hair style communism. Not on board. I realize that ombré is a style and it’s supposed to look similar but these people all have twin heads and I’m afraid.

These gals have the bags!

Okay okay I’ll let it go.

I’m sorry I’ve been snarky the past few days I just can’t take the winter anymore that’s all there is to it.

So the Morning March of Gals Down 15th St culminates at the front door of Rent the Runway where everybody tries to navigate their way inside. It’s especially hard now because the winter time vestibule thing is in front of the door so it’s two doors and a weird small space to maneuver. Fun, fun.

There are bins on wheels outside the store FILLED with discarded clothes, bags, and accessories that people have just returned. It’s an explosion of fabric and color and fashion and you can kinda pick things out in your mind and be like “I saw that one on that app!” If you’re so inclined. They’re on their way to get cleaned, baby!

Outside are men chosen to do the (flying spaghetti monster) lord’s work that are loading these bins into big trucks that will be taken to…Secaucus! Yes I believe they go to New Jersey. Where they belong. In a good way. Obviously.

Although the Rent the Runway flagship store is bananas AF, they actually do a very good job of corralling everyone during the return process. There is a long line but it is clearly marked by stanchions and moves fast.

When you return your stuff, you just have to walk up to an iPad and scan its tag and make sure it scanned and then toss it in a bin. You don’t even have to talk to a person WHICH IS OBVI THE BEST PART. During this morning rush they also have some of the gals at the desk check in the items. I don’t know, maybe they always do. Whatever.

There is also a gal manning the line to keep order and she keeps calling us “ladies” like “Good morning ladies!” “Please stand over here ladies!” In such a sweet voice and it always cracks me up because we’re not ladies at this point. We’re obviously out of control wild animals trying to get our stuff returned as quickly as possible so we can click to order more stuff on the app and then go to work and get going with the day.

If you happen to be a gal with leisure time and you can walk around the store and choose your items that way, GOOD FOR FREAKIN YOU. But they do have a very nice set up. I’ve walked through and looked at stuff when I have a little extra time and they have a pretty good selection as far as different types of clothes in different types of sizes. There is a nice fitting room and you can use iPads to check OUT as well. But no one is ever crowding around them like ravenous animals.

Tumbleweeds next to these iPads…

Today I actually made a friend! She saw me creepily taking pictures of some stuff and she was like “Are you using the app to scan?” And I was awkwardly like “Um no uh I’m just taking a pic to show my…friend. What?” And then she showed me how to use the app to scan items in the store and then I can check them out through the app or add them to my wishlist and it was honestly a great life hack.

This is the pic that made me a friend.

I never make friends in settings that aren’t intentionally social so this was a very rare moment but I’m not mad about it. Also she’s not actually my “friend” I talked to her for 40 seconds. Ugh. Gotta get over myself.

Yes, the Rent the Runway flagship store IS bananas. And since I’ve gone many times a week in the last couple of weeks I wanted to reflect on that. So I did. I do love Rent the Runway and have no complaints. And if I DID have a complaint they would fix it because they have pretty good customer service.

I don’t work for them. JUST A FAN. A BIG ONE. K COOL.

Do you use Rent the Runway? Have you ever been to the store in the morning? Have you done the March of the Women Down 15th St with your black garment back? It’s a dignified march and I’m glad to be a part of it.

you should wear colors.

I was thinking about this today and you should wear colors. I like colors. I prefer colors to the absence of color (black) and the abyss of all colors mixed together (white).

You should wear colors because when it comes down to it what else do you really have to hold onto in this world? Is black really a better choice for your ENTIRE outfit? Is boring ass Essie Ballet Slippers really what you want on your nails every single time you get a manicure?

Oh it is? Sorry. I’ll let you have that. But just know that it’s no way to live your life, my friends.

As with all things I post about, this is just my opinion, and I don’t really care about your opinion. But like not in a mean way! I’ll allow it to exist. You can continue to live in your reality without the fear that I will disrupt it. I mean I have zero power to influence the disruption of anything, least of all ENTIRE REALITIES, so don’t be scared.

Glad we got that out of the way.

In New York and the surrounding area everyone “wears black” because it’s “the New York way.” And it is. Black is everywhere. If you look at a rack of coats anywhere at any time during the winter in New York, 99% of the time all of the coats will be 100% black. Black DOES go with everything, and that’s great. But like, LIVE A LITTLE.

To be honest, there is more than one black coat in my closet. Black goes with every color! Because it…is NOT color?! Is that why black goes with every color BECAUSE IT IS NOT A COLOR?! <head explodes>

When I was like 12 or 13 I went to Miami and it was like being on ANOTHER PLANET. I felt like I was an alien that had never seen my home planet but THIS, MIAMI, was my home planet because everyone was wearing colors and every piece of everything down to the very building we stayed in was a bright and vibrant color.

It really washes over you in a deluge of fab, the color of Miami. All of the colors are different but they somehow complement each other. Add in the lush green of all the shit that grows there since it’s Florida and it rains every day at precisely 2:47pm and you’ve got a really beautiful place.

You should wear colors, because colors say, “I’m here and I’m living out loud and YOU CAN’T STOP ME!” I dare you to wear a bright color and not feel like this. Most people are visual and they make judgements based on their visions and when you wear color they pick up what you’re putting down. And what you’re putting down is that you CANNOT BE STOPPED.

There is power in wearing colors. Most would say there’s power in black (AGAINNN with the New York thing <eyeroll>), but I beg to differ. Black allows you to blend in, to become faceless in the crowd, to shrink against a wall, to sneak stealthily in the night. Now, there are times where it is 100% NECESSARY to sneak stealthily in the night and I respect that. But when it’s not the night and you don’t need to be stealthy I think you should wear colors.

I just think…you should.

Colors are fun! Pick your favorite one! Wear a whole outfit of that color! Pick two that don’t go together, that’s even more fun! Wear a pattern! Wear three different patterns! It’s all an exciting and interesting way to exist in the world!

Personally I feel victimized and shamed by every fashion magazine or blog or gal on morning television that’s like, “You just gotta stock up on baaaaasicssss.” BITCH! I don’t want baaaaasicsssss…I WANT COLORS AND I WANT STUFF THAT DOESN’T “GO WITH EVERYTHING.”

My personal closet strategy is to buy and/or rent whatever I think is great, regardless of what it will “go with.” This poses an issue because money unforch doesn’t grow inside of ATM machines (or “MAC” machines) as I surmised it did as a child. So recently I’ve been poking around the stuff I already have and creating new and interesting combinations and it’s been very exciting! I’ll share some! But not now because it’s a Wednesday and I’m tired.

If I was ever forced into some kind of cartoon character closet utilitarian Kondo situaish and I could only pick like 7 things, one for every day of the week, each of these things would be a different color and one thing would be black. BECAUSE IT WOULD GO WITH EACH OTHER THING. Then I’d just have to make it work from there.

The black thing would be tights. The rest would be patterned or brightly colored dresses. Boom. It works. Fully Kondo-ed.

OMG JK PLZ DON’T LET THAT HAPPEN I ALREADY HAVE NIGHTMARES THAT MARIE KONDO COMES FOR ME AND TAKES ALL MY STUFF. And I wake in a panic because it all brings me joy! ALL of it. IT’S A BIG OL COLORFUL FIRE OF LITTLE JOY SPARKS ALL OVER THE PLACE.

You should wear colors. You’re missing out.

i found a lamp on my street lewk.

Today I walked outside to take some photos and I found a lamp on my street.

Possibly more importantly, here is a link to $100 off Rent the Runway Unlimited. That’s where most of the “I found a lamp on my street lewk” is from!

I took pics next to this lamp and was pretty pumped about it.

Afterwards I went inside to put my tripod away and decided I wanted the lamp.

But when I went back outside, it was gone.

Darn.

Dress and jacket, Rent the Runway. Lace shirt, Free People. Necklace, Stone Cooper. Eyeliner, Urban Decay.